Thursday, March 25, 2010

I Want To Be Like Her

This beautiful lady is my Grandmother.

She is the most gracious person I know. She truly believes she is the most blessed person that ever lived and exudes the kind of unconditional love for her family that most people never, ever have a chance to feel. I have been lucky enough to be surrounded by this kind of love from her and so many others in my family my entire life.

For all her love and faith and compassion, life hasn't been easy for her. Or, at least I didn't think so. The thing I love her most for is that she looks beyond the bad and sees the good in things.

Before I moved to Washington I wanted to spend an entire day with her. I remember everything about it. Grandma's house has a warm, homey smell that I can't describe, but I know that scent by heart. She was making us beef stew for lunch and we were going through boxes and boxes of old photographs in the pink room.

We found this picture of my Grandfather.

I never thought much about him. I knew he was an alcoholic and that he left my Grandma with three young boys when my Dad was just three years old. My other Grandpa once said that when Grandpa Phillip was sober, he was the nicest guy you could ever meet, but when he was drunk, he was a mean 'ol cuss.

Grandma and I kept looking through those old pictures and when she came across this one she told me she wished I could have known my Grandpa.

I asked her what he was like. How did they meet? Where did he live? We talked about him for hours. She obviously loved him very much. I thought it was strange that she still had so much love for him when, in my mind, he wasn't that great of a person.

Then Grandma said something that changed my entire perspective. She told me that Grandpa knew he could never be the kind of husband and father that he felt she and his boys deserved so he gave up everything he loved so that they could have a better life. While I had always judged him harshly for leaving them, she loved him for his sacrifice. We cried together over the loss we each shared.

My Grandpa Phillip came back to visit my family when I was very little. I don't remember it at all, but I wish I did. I wish I had been able to know him and love him.

I treasure my relationship with my Grandma and have so much love and respect for her. I will always keep this memory close to my heart and hope it helps me remember to look for the good in people.



Samantha said...

I could not have said it better myself! That woman is amazing. Even with everything going on right now she keeps reminding herself that we are all so blessed.

Sometimes Grandma watches our little dog Sophie and she comes home smelling just like Grandma's house. I love that smell. If you ever need a reminder of home, go to a store and pick up some White Shoulder powder (in a pink box). A little smell will remind you of her.

Thanks for this post. I needed it today! Love and miss you!!

Mom said...

She truly is a very special lady. She's an inspiration to all who know her.

Donna B. said...

I have always admired her...she is the person that can make you feel like family in her home when you are simply visiting. And I'm amazed how much Michael and Matt look like your Grandpa! Great post